It’s 2013, for crying out loud

9 Feb

from’t there some things you thought we would have figured out?? I mean it’s 2013.

When I watch old movies, I love how they pictured the future. Lots of metallic outfits, cars that drive themselves and really tall buildings. I recently read Disclosure by Michael Crichton. It was written and set in the early 90’s in a technology firm. They were trailblazing the future storage potential of CDRoms. They have incredible storage space and will truly be the medium of the the future.


Things changed. There are somethings we are up to speed on. Inventions that seem right for the time. Way to go world on: the snuggie, cruise control, smart phones, electric tea kettles and DVR.

There are some things, or more like a lack of things that make me think, “It’s 2013, for crying out loud!”  Here’s my list.

1. Teeth- Almost every child in the USA gets braces (except me), retainers, cranks or bite-mending appliances glued into his or her mouth. That’s a lot of time and money to spend on a product that can so easily get knocked out by a wayward pop fly at a beer league softball game. Or stained by a coffee habit. Or chipped on pretty much anything reasonably hard.

Why are we not knocking everyone’s teeth out when they’re done growing (high school age?) and replacing them with harder, whiter, straighter, more durable teeth? Can someone please invent that material already? At some point you have to stop putting money into that old clunker and buck up for a more dependable care.

Do with that analogy what you will, but I would happily get new teeth. Earbuds- As a daily iPod user, I spend at least two minutes everyday untangling the knot of earbuds that has formed in the bottom of my purse. That’s at least 10 minutes a week (if not more). Ten minutes a week? That’s enough time to call my mom.

3. Standard computerized medical records- Hopefully this is heading our way with the ACA. Why do I have to fill out my entire life history and family tree every time I go to a different doctor. Can’t we all just share a database? I’m over it.

5. Yoga pants at work- They really aren’t too different-looking than my black dress pants. They are sooooo much more comfortable. And they don’t wrinkle. And I already have a million pairs. I think this is a tiny change that would make a huge difference in my life.

6. Delayed Shipping- I wish the U.S. Postal Service would start a delayed shipping program. My idea, is if you mail a card or package a few weeks in advance, you can decide what day it will get delivered to the person receiving. I know this would be a logistical nightmare, but it’s 2013. I wish I could send cards that would arrive on someone’s birthday, not the day before or after.

Holidays would be extra tough, like Valentines Day and Halloween and stuff, but I think there’s a way to organize this. If I can schedule an email, I think I should be able to schedule a package or a birthday card.

All of these ideas are trademark of me. Don’t you dare try to monetize my genius.

4 Responses to “It’s 2013, for crying out loud”

  1. Sierra February 10, 2013 at 2:39 am #

    HOly crap. I just found your blog and am obsessed with it. Let’s be friends.

    • smwhitney February 10, 2013 at 8:40 pm #

      Haha, nice to meet you! I can’t wait to check out yours:)

  2. erinjoneil February 10, 2013 at 8:45 am #

    It’s 2013. You’d think by now I wouldn’t have to scrape ice off my car windshield in the morning. With everything else my car can do it can’t not get iced over or defrost itself in a couple seconds.

    • smwhitney February 10, 2013 at 8:40 pm #

      That is the best idea. I mean, my car can probably cook a pizza but the door handles still get frozen shut?

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